Monday, December 30, 2013

Be Thankful for the Good and Bad Times of 2013

I just came back from the hospital and another illness is added to the list! Doctor confidently diagnosed my bald patch as Alopecia Areata and asked me to use the same topical treatment cream I applied on my Vitiligo patches.

For those who didn’t know, last year I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia, Disc Herniation and Sciatica. In between all that, I have frequent diaarrhoea, food poisoning, sinusitis, sleep disruption, headaches and etc. Earlier this year, Vitiligo came and leeched itself on me. Just last month, the doctor guessed I have Neuritis and today, I am given Alopecia. Wow, what’s next?

As I googled up on Alopecia, it says that 1 in 5 people would progress to total baldness. So I’m going bald after turning slowly into a leopard with spots? What other autoimmune disorders will creep up? How disfigured will I get? Will I be shunned by society? Hmmm…should I freak out? For some reason, I am unusually calm although I can’t say I am not disappointed, upset or more sombre than usual.

Beginning of this year, I quit my stressful job and came back to my hometown. I’ve been ‘jobless’ for almost a year although I do get part time/freelance stuffs once in a while. The illnesses have taken a toll on my body physically, mentally, emotionally and even spiritually. I’ve gained 10 kgs since last year. Tomorrow is the last day of the year. Should I lash curses at God and hold resentment against him? Should I throw away all smiles and laughter and wallow in self-pity? I think not.

As I look back at this past year of 2013, there is much to be thankful for. Yes, even in my multiple sicknesses and trials and losses, I am thankful. I won’t put up a front and tell you that it has been a breeze and every day I had wakened up being grateful. I confess I have been bitterly frustrated, depressed, fearful, doubtful and even angry at God many times. Why did the Almighty God allow heaps of things to happen to me?

 Well, He’s God and I’m not. Therefore, I will never completely understand and grasp the big picture that He has in mind. I believe He has a plan for all these. He always does. He promises in

Romans 8:28 ‘We know that all things work together for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose.’

If God can give Sarah a child at her impossible old age and raised Lazarus from the dead, I am sure there is nothing that is impossible for Him. There must be something good out of all these trials and sufferings.

First and foremost, I am very grateful for the Lord’s grace and strength for helping me get through my painful days and days when I felt hope was just too far away. I am especially thankful for His constant Providence through unexpected sources that has kept me going although I was and still am technically jobless. I even get to go on several travel trips overseas through sponsors! I also thank God for the generous love from my family and friends. I still get to celebrate Christmas where many are homeless and cannot even go to church because of terrible disasters like the typhoon that plagued so many Filipinos. I am thankful for shelter and food and looking at my size, I’m sure you will know that there is always plenty of food on the table, if not too much. 

I would also like to thank God for the many times I've been hurt, misunderstood, rejected and humiliated for at times like these, I felt I had a glimpse of God's painful sacrifice for us. I thank God for all my illnesses because they keep me a little humbler and dependable on God for without Him I cannot go on especially on days when my physical strength is at its lowest. It was at times like these that I sometimes felt the closest to God although there were many times that I thought He had abandoned me. Again, those times were crucial to help me develop my faith. I sure hope it is not diminishing but growing instead. I am glad to still be alive, kicking and moving where millions have died or became bed-ridden.

Due to my ‘joblessness’, I have time on my hands and I have been immersing myself in creative projects from crafts, paintings and especially writing. Writing has always been a childhood dream buried and forgotten because it is not something someone in my country would encourage you to take seriously especially if it involves fiction or storytelling. Same goes to painting. There are plenty of poor artists around me and those who cared didn’t want me to end up like them. I am thankful however that my family supports my endeavours and although most of them do not understand or even read my writings especially my poetry, they never stopped me from doing them or put pressure on me to quickly find a desk job or a 9 to 5 occupation. I mostly felt the ongoing pressure from within myself. It is by facing the dark and forging ahead to fight those battles that I was able to draw much inspiration to write and paint. So for these trying times, I want to thank God for leading me through this foggy war. Without all these ‘unforeseen circumstances’, I would never have time to sit down, reflect, write and paint. I would have been too busy trying to look my best, be my best at my career and on top of that, acting like a social butterfly fleeting from one party to the next.

I don’t know if I will ever be cured of all my sicknesses or whether I will get financially stabilised in 2014. One thing I know and I’m certain of is that God is always with us. No matter the hurdles he’ll make me jump over or the raging sea that he’ll have me cross, I know He is faithful even when I am not and that means He’ll give me all the necessary graces to not only persevere but to rise above them all triumphantly. And so, in sickness or in health, in baldness or in full crown of glory, I thank God and will thank Him for all He has prepared for me in this coming year. After all, what are a little baldness, a little pain and a little poverty as compared to the crucifixion pains and humiliation suffered by Jesus on the cross? What we have or will ever have is pale in comparison to His. Let us draw strength from He who has been through it all.

As He has commanded, let us obey and


'give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.' (1 Thess 5:18)


By the way, I am working on my first novel while compiling my poetry. Hopefully, I’ll get to publish them both in 2014. Also, more paintings will be on sale! Here’s to a fruitful and joyous Happy New Year no matter whatever circumstances we find ourselves in. One more thing, I thank God for you. Will you pray for me as I pray for you?



Saturday, December 21, 2013

A Christmas Dedication

Hello Readers!

This piece is specially drawn for my beloved friends, family and YOU! Yes, I would like to dedicate this artwork to a fellow reader of my blog. Thanks for stopping by.

A Christmas Blessing to You by Angelina Bong

A very Happy and Blessed Christmas to all who are celebrating. A fruitful  year end to those who are not celebrating. Happy Holidays and a Joyous New Year to all of you! Thanks for making my life more colourful!

Love,
Angelina Bong.


Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Rhythm of the Moon



One by one
Your fingers caress the guitar
Plucking strings of gold
Melodies down my skin
Soothing flares of broken cries

A smile flash
Joy blossoming
My feet move like twisted butterflies
Magical notes soaring like
 vespers of angelic breath
I am halfway between
Yes and unsure

My wings fly to reach
Touch the hues of smoky treble
In the palm of my hand
Que sera sera echoing
Foggy whispers of nonchalant songs
Float towards me
In the vast universe

You continue to serenade
Stars beaming
You tremble
Graces flow from your playing
I climb
The magical stairs
Stroke your long golden locks
Precious and hidden from the eyes of the earth

I see no dangers
I fall like leaves in autumn
You catch me
With your music of light
Casting spells
With a strand of your hair
Celtic drums pounding on my heart
You wish upon the shooting arrows of orient glory

I fear
Your hallowed presence
Bow down with reverence
Singing mercies
You seem so far away

Out of love
The moon spins
Fear resides losing balance
My pulse follows the beats to your tempo
Leaving behind a trail of sopranos
The stars blink back in emptiness
You shut your eyes
And see from within

I will sing
On my feet
Touching hips
We surrender to fate
The guitar continues to play
The stars weep alone
We dance to the rhythm of the moon

This poem was recited last Friday, 13th in Lov Gallery at 'Strong Words' Event...

Monday, December 16, 2013

Dreaming of a White Christmas



A week more before the day takes flight,
Dreaming of a starlit holy silent night

If only snow flakes will come my way, 
That is all I ever want on Christmas day

Will you be Santa and make it all white?
So that my mouth will be grinning wide

Monday Blues



Chase away the Monday blues,
Wear not dread in weary hues,
May brightness dwell and spread,
Seize the day and be not afraid,
Let no one stop you in any ways,
To be good and kind all your days

Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Twist with Kolo Mee

This is another artwork exhibited at Lov Gallery for the Lov Kuching exhibition. 

Again, food is my main inspiration for this painting! 

Definition of Kolo Mee (Hokkien to English)
Kolo means Dry
Mee means Noodle

Twist with Kolo Mee by Angelina Bong


















Twist with Kolo Mee is an acrylic painting portraying the playful and laidback persona
 of Kuching indulging in its addictive Kolo Mee, the love of many Kuching people. 
Just like the other artwork, the background’s symbolic shades are derived from 
colours often used to depict Kuching and Sarawak, mainly from the hornbill and the 
Sarawak flag.

Festivals galore enchant the world in meek Kuching,
Travellers from afar fall in love or have a fling,
Still the heart of chaos and worries for both you and me,
Break free from the norm, laugh and dare twist like kolo mee


 BTW IT IS ALSO FOR SALE...

If you would like a special, one of a kind artsy gift for a special someone, do 
consider getting this. Feel free to leave a comment whether or not
 you wish to purchase :) International delivery is available. Happy Christmas.

Do drop by my art blog at http://swakgel.blogspot.com. I promise to update more SOON.

Monday, December 9, 2013

Dance with Laksa

This is one of the paintings that I have recently put up for an exhibition at Lov Gallery. The theme of the exhibition was Lov Kuching. What's more inspiring than food in Kuching? So, this one's dedicated for food lovers.

Dance with Laksa by Angelina Bong

This acrylic piece is inspired by one of Kuching’s most popular delicacies, the famous Sarawak Laksa and the love of festivals. Every year, festivals like the ‘Kuching Food Fest’ and the ‘Rainforest World Music Festival’ are celebrated in glory. Dance with Laksa incorporates the love of festivals expressed through a dancing girl into the enjoyment of this exotic dish.

Music and food unites the hearts of Kuching lovers,
No matter if you like breakfasts, lunches or dinners,
Whether you’re a fan of ballet, ngajat or salsa,
Be prepared to feast, dine and have a dance with laksa

BTW IT IS ALSO FOR SALE...

If you would like a unique gift to give as Christmas, do consider this. Leave a comment if you wish to purchase. International delivery available. :) cheers.

Do visit my art blog at http://swakgel.blogspot.com. I'll update it more from now on.

Do you have Conflicting Desires?

I found the below 'expression' in one of my 'caverns' written a while ago.


May what is false within us
Before your truth give way
That we may live untroubled
With quiet hearts this day


As I prayed the words above for my morning prayers today, I realized how much we need peace in the midst of our hearts. How many times we are conflicted with contradicting desires? How many of us are fighting deep inside, antagonizing each desire that come our way? How many of us have mixed emotions or worse, excessively expressing our emotion in a wrong way because our desires are not fulfilled?


How many times we can get angry over a small argument and threw tables? How many times we speak harshly to someone who criticize us and more often than not, they are only correcting us because they care? How many times we feel angry because of rejection from someone we are attracted to? How many times we feel envious because our best friend has a better dress, better car or a better house? And in the midst of all these, we are plagued with troubles in our hearts.


Why do we have conflicting desires? This is because our flesh or our body desires differently from our spirit. Our flesh has worldly appetites, even sinful cravings. Inappropriate sexual cravings, excessive food, wealth, fame and the list goes on. When we do not achieve these, we get angry, disappointed and even depressed. But do we really need all these? Paul says in his letter to the Galatians 5:16-17; ‘Live by the spirit, I say and do not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the flesh desires is opposed to the spirit, and what the spirit desires is opposed to the flesh; for these are opposed to each other, to prevent you from doing what you want.’


When we are filled with the Holy Spirit and therefore walking righteously with the Lord, we will find slowly, all these unnecessary cravings and disordered emotions will go away. How do we know if what we desire is not from the Lord? Again, Paul said in Galatians 5:19-21; ‘Now the works of the flesh are obvious: fornication, impurity, licentiousness, idolatry, sorcery, enmities, strife, jealousy, anger, quarrels, dissensions, factions, envy, drunkenness, carousing and things like these.’


Instead, ask the Holy Spirit to come to your hearts everyday and be guided by His spirit. Galatians 5:22 and 5:25 tells us that ‘By contrast, the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control’. ‘If we live by the spirit, let us be guided by the spirit. Do not be afraid to ask the Holy Spirit to come and change you, to mould you into the person you are meant to be, to fill you with these fruits that Paul mentioned. Only then, you will find peace in your heart and all that is false within you will give way to truth. You will find no more troubled hearts as God slowly realigned your desires with His.


May the good Lord constantly guide you and fill you with His Holy Spirit so that you will be perfected and become more like Christ. Amen.


God bless.


Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Wait in Ecstasy


I draw your face on my skin,
My feet dangling in thin air,
Whispering voices in the attic,
I hide in the cocoon of love,
Half floating above angels

Veils of wonder amaze me,
On bended knees I see,
Music hanging behind closets,
I touch the notes of union,
Miss the glitter in the dark

Your spirit dwells in flames,
Cloister of vines fall on me,
Sweet wine to sip and smell,
The stairs creak of footprints,
Up high the romance begins

Face to face in cloaks of silk,
Embroidered heart lingers on,
The perfect pearl in my fingers,
Somewhere in ecstasy of rest,
The night and day knows no time

Slow to take my beloved in white
Unchained youth feeds on blue
Fall at your feet with a rose
I adore and throw leaves of honey
Out of sight in chalice of gold

The light of moon lies awake,
Glass shatters into diamonds,
I catch your kisses of treasure,
My arms swell with wings of bliss,
Ablaze I say no more and wait

Monday, December 2, 2013

Woe to me if I do not preach the gospel

Many of us remember Francis Xavier today, the great evangelizer and promoter of the good news of the Gospel.

I would like to share an excerpt from one of his letters. I hope you will be as inspired by this as I am :)

"From the letters to Saint Ignatius by Saint Francis Xavier, priest 
(E Vita Francisci Xaverii, auctore H. Tursellini, Romae, 1956, Lib. 4, epist. 4 [1542] et 5 [1544]) 

Woe to me if I do not preach the gospel 

We have visited the villages of the new converts who accepted the Christian religion a few years ago. No Portuguese live here the country is so utterly barren and poor. The native Christians have no priests. They know only that they are Christians. There is nobody to say Mass for them; nobody to teach them the Creed, the Our Father, the Hail Mary and the Commandments of God’s Law. 

I have not stopped since the day I arrived. I conscientiously made the rounds of the villages. I bathed in the sacred waters all the children who had not yet been baptised. This means that I have purified a very large number of children so young that, as the saying goes, they could not tell their right hand from their left. The older children would not let me say my Office or eat or sleep until I taught them one prayer or another. Then I began to understand: “The kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” 

I could not refuse so devout a request without failing in devotion myself. I taught them, first the confession of faith in the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit, then the Apostles’ Creed, the Our Father and Hail Mary. I noticed among them persons of great intelligence. If only someone could educate them in the Christian way of life, I have no doubt that they would make excellent Christians. 

Many, many people hereabouts are not becoming Christians for one reason only: there is nobody to make them Christians. Again and again I have thought of going round the universities of Europe, especially Paris, and everywhere crying out like a madman, riveting the attention of those with more learning than charity: “What a tragedy: how many souls are being shut out of heaven and falling into hell, thanks to you!”

I wish they would work as hard at this as they do at their books, and so settle their account with God for their learning and the talents entrusted to them.

This thought would certainly stir most of them to meditate on spiritual realities, to listen actively to what God is saying to them. They would forget their own desires, their human affairs, and give themselves over entirely to God’s will and his choice. They would cry out with all their heart: Lord, I am here! What do you want me to do? Send me anywhere you like – even to India. "


The above excerpt is plucked from the link below:

http://www.liturgies.net/saints/francisxavier/readings.htm

God bless you and may your light shine the brightest where it is the darkest. May you bring the good news to the end of the world. Shalom.